I'm going for the gold in 2014!
]]>They have caused me lots of mental harm, due to the fact that I can never say crayon properly, and besides being funny, it's emotionally scarring.
Article:
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/lohan_such_baby_jVdQWABj9z0MgXzCv1Nh1O
]]>I would go vegan if I had a personal cook who made me yummy food for every meal and snack. Since I'm planning on retiring in the next 5 months, and will then hire a vegan chef, I decided to do some research on all things vegan, and here are some of the highlights from my research.
1.) Vegans smell bad. Omega 3 fatty acid blocks odor production glads. Granted, a vegan can in theory take an omega 3 supliment, but good luck finding a vegan version of that...
2.) 90% of all vegan cook books are printed using non-vegan printing materials. It's not as bad as reading a book made from the pelts of baby otters, but it's still not vegan!
3.) The average vegan goes poop 4 times a day, and due to the vegan diet the poops are quick and easy! While this might sound like a good thing, this would really cut into my reading time, and thus, bogus!
4.) I might have to go vegan, so that I can win the "2010 Sexiest Vegan" contest...
]]>1.) Honey is the only food item that will never spoil. (I still sort of think this is true)
2.) If you eat "half a bear" of local honey you will cure all signs of alergies.
3.) Prego ladies can't eat honey cause then the unborn bees in the honey will hatch and sting your baby.
4.) Flies also make honey, but no one wants to eat that crap.
5.) You are able to contract herpes from a tainted batch of honey.
6.) When honey spoils it tastes like chicken (not sure why this was believed, after already telling everyone that honey doesn't/can't spoil).
]]>Ever since I've decided that I'm going to make my first million by designing a facebook game I've gotten more into the one facebook game that I've ever played: Farmville. I call this "research", other may call it something as rude as an addiction.
For everything bad you can say about facebook games, you have to admit how smart zynga (maker of farmville, and other grossly popular facebook games) is for these games. If you want your farm to be cooler then your friends then you will have to pay a small amount of real money for that extra special item. Need a few more coins to finish planting a farm full of soy beans? Well you can just buy a few thousand coins for just a couple of bucks. I have no doubt that they are making fistfulls of money, and seeing at just how easily it is for people to be tricked into spending money playing that game I now understand why they want you to email all your friends every time a chicken in your chicken coop poops. Every new player who gets hooked is sure to spend some money feeding their addiction.
So if you are reading this (John, Kathy, and Nora), and play farmville, well invite me to your be your neighbor! I only have two!
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I'm going for the gold in 2014!
]]>He was also kicked out of the circus due to becoming overly agressive, which I can only assume was due to the booze.
With this info it is clear that the monkey only picked up smoking to chill himself out, I can't blame him.
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Yes, I bought a reusable grocery bag, does that mean I need it to be that gross shade of green?
The commercialization of the color green for the sake of being green is getting on my nerves, and if I want to save the planet one grocery bag at a time, then i don't need to broadcast it to everyone.
So here are my plans for making the website as Green as possible:
1.) I promise to turn off all lights once I leave the office.
2.) All hyperlinks on this site will now be the color green, which implies that they are infact a "green link"
3.) I will cut down one less tree a day, as such I will now only cut down 29 trees a day.
4.) I will buy a "Hybrid" sticker, and put it on the car I drive, to take this one step further, I will put a 2nd sticker on the train that I take on my commute to work.
5.) I will officially stop buying cases of vodka for Oil Tanker captains. Hopefully this will increase their boating skills, and lower the chance of them crashing and spilling their oil.
If you have any further ideas on how to make FotD "green" please let us know, or if you would like to join me, and take this pledge, please let me know.
]]>Personally I would want to get one that looked like an X-ray, like the "long arm break" (scroll down to the bottom).
So who's with me?
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The police beat in the Wildcat was a great escape during boring lectures (in case my parents are reading, there were no boring lectures, I loved them all). I noticed a trend that there was always some random pervy dude in the library creeping out chicks, so that gave me a great idea...
One day in my nutrition class one of the creepy guys from the paper sort of met my description (white dude, sort of douchey looking), so i decided to use the police beat to introduce myself to a group of girls sitting infront of me me, and I instructed my friend RIV to watch, and learn:
Me:"Hey, sorry to bug you, but I'm just excited, I'm in the Wildcat!"
What I can only assume was a hot chick: "Oh really? that's great, lets see"
Me: "I'm in the police beat, second story down!" - Hands the girls the paper.
Girls: start reading... pause, look at eachother, hand back the paper...
So it wasn't the perfect pickup line, but it had potential!
Here is a sample of the creepiness that happens in the UA library: from the Daily Wildcat police beat, taken from a recent edition:
Man plays sick trick on library chick
UAPD officers responded to the Main Library on Nov. 11 at 3:15 p.m. in reference to a report of indecent exposure. Upon arrival, officers met with a female student who told them she had been on the south side of the fourth floor when a man exposed himself to her. She said she had been studying when she saw a man in his 60s or 70s sit in a chair approximately five to seven feet away from hers. She stated that at one point, the man got up and approached her, tapped on her shoulder and asked her for the time. She gave him the time and he replied, “Sorry to bother you, I have 15 minutes.” He then laughed and returned to his chair.
When she looked up minutes later, she observed that the man had a red book in his lap. His pants were unzipped and his penis was fully exposed. The woman stated that the man was masturbating. The man then stood up, put his penis back into his pants and stated, “I have to go now.” He smiled at her and then left, taking the red book with him. Police searched the library for the man but were unable to locate anyone matching the description they were given. The woman told police that she would press charges if police were able to locate the man. She was issued a Victim’s Rights form.
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